Chinese Korean BBQ tuition

Corbett | August 23, 2006 11:31 PM

When you order food in China, you'll see that the locals will always squabble over the bill with the waiter. This is usually because it's probably not correct.
Or in my case tonight at the local Korean BBQ, just the standard nickle and dime scam.

Me: "So if my dinner cost me 38 yuan, plus 15 yuan for the soup, plus 5 yuan for the drink, and 2 yuan for the extra bowl of rice, why is the total 70 yuan, and not 60 yuan?"

Waiter: "Because that's what you ordered."

Me: "Let me see the bill. So what is this extra 1 yuan for here?" I point at the bill at an extra charge.

Waiter: "That's for the extra sauce."

Me: "I didn't order extra sauce."

Waiter: "It's right there in front of you. You've been dipping your meat in it."

Me: "But I didn't order that. It was put in front of me with my meal."

Waiter: "Well it costs 1 yuan."

Me: "But I didn't order it!"

Waiter: "Then you should have returned it."

Me: "And what about this other 1 yuan here?" I point at another addition.

Waiter: "That's for the other sauce."

Me: "What other sauce?"

Waiter: "The other one in front of you."

Me: "But I didn't order that either! It came with all the side dishes."

Waiter: "Well it costs 1 yuan."

Me: "But I didn't order it!"

Waiter: "Then you should have returned it, but then you wouldn't have had any sauce to dip your meat in."

Me: "So I have to pay for a sauce that's on the table and is supposed to come with the meal so that I can eat my meal."

Waiter: "Yes."

Me: "So what is this 1 yuan here?" I point at another addition on the bill.

Waiter: "That's for the chopsticks."

Me: "You've got be fucking kidding! I have to pay to use the chopsticks?"

Waiter: "They come with the wet nap."

Me: "So?"

Waiter: "That costs 1 yuan."

Me: "But I didn't order chopsticks!"

Waiter: "Then you should have returned them."

Me: "Then what do I eat with?"

Waiter: Silence

Me: "And what is this other 5 yuan here?" I point on a separate piece of paper.

Waiter: "Oh, that's for use of the BBQ burner."

Me: "Oh c'mon, you've got to be kidding! I'm supposed to pay for being able to cook the meat so that I can eat it?"

Waiter: "Yes, it costs 5 yuan."

Me: "And what is this final 2 yuan for?"

Waiter: "That's for the girl to cook your meat for you."

Me: "But I didn't ask her to."

Waiter: "But she cooked the meat."

Me: "Yes, because she asked me if I wanted her to cook the meat....oh I see...."

Waiter: "Yes, that costs 2 yuan."

Me: "But she didn't tell me it cost extra to let her cook the meat after she asked if she could."

Waiter: "It still costs 2 yuan. 70 yuan altogether."

Me: "I see. You're collecting my tuition aren't you?"

Waiter: "Huh?"

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Category: Mr. Asia

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